Movie Review: Love Me

 

Michael's Movie Grade: F

A pretentious and pointless art film.

This is a high concept movie with an idea that it is hard to say has been done before. This film centers around a love affair between a buoy and satellite after humanity's extinction.  

With this strange story this movie tries to answer questions like "what does it mean to be alive," "how do you define love," "why are we here" and "how do we define ourselves." In its attempts to answer these questions, it answers none of them. All this movie offers us is pointless pseudo-philosophical ramblings that amount to the equivalent of a middle schooler trying to sound profound. The filmmakers obviously think they have something profound to tell us with this story. However, whatever they are trying to say is clear to no one else but them. There are many scenes that make you think, "this is supposed to be thought-provoking," but leave you unsure of how. 

Even as a romantic film, this movie fails. The characters feel almost like outlines for characters rather than real people. You simply cannot connect to or relate to either of them. Also, for a romantic story, we never feel like these characters care for each other at all. They say they do but it never shows in their interactions with each other. Not only do they not feel like a couple, but they also don't even feel like friends. Kristen Stewart and Steven Yuen try their best with these roles, but it is simply not possible to make us care about these characters. 

This movie is only about an hour and a half. However, there were many times watch this that I was wondering, if the runtime I read before watching was correct. It feels much longer than an hour and a half and there are many movies that are over two hours that much shorter than this. 

This film is a waste of time that works neither as art nor entertainment. Avoid at all costs.